Feature story

My name is Ben Dover. I was born in Saran, Crapatoli on October 57, 1745. I was born to a very very large family. The first word i ever learned to spell was elephant. i fought in world war 2 against my old snobby grandpappy. We were enemies because he sold my mother to a farm. I declared war against him when i was ten years of age when he tried to sew a tail on my backside.
After years of fighting, i finally defeated the ole fart. he was a tough one to beat but all i had to do was take away his love, his precious chinese puppy(which he called Chow)! He finally surrendered and i was the champion of the world! Did i mention that my grandpappy was the meanest thing that roamed the earth! Yeah that's right i called him a thing instead of a person, because thats how special he was to me.
Later on in life i married a woman named Amanda Hugginkiss. She was the best thing that ever happened to me! We loved each other so much and she was the perfect wife. She died while she was in childbirth of our third child, Joy Killa. I have been devastated since then and have never moved on. I live every day in depression and misery. I awake to find that this devastating life of mine was all a dream!
I really am a 25 year old that is engaged to be married on 11/11/11. We plan to drink from the Fountain of Youth and live together forever! We are moving to our own peninsula and living off of love and fish from the sea. Oh and if you were wondering, her name is Anne Pickettup. Forever and always, Ben Dover & Anne Pickettup!<3